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Rebecca Alvarez LCSW, MEd th 255 South 17 Street, Suite 1509, Philadelphia PA 19103 267-405-6396 • alvarez.lcsw@gmail.com • www.rebeccajalvarez.com Queered Sensate Focus Exercise Sensate Focus is a sex therapy intervention developed by Masters and Johnson that helps partners bring mindfulness to how they touch one another. This is done with progressive physical exploration between consenting partners, the use of the here-and-now exercises, and post-exploration discussions with a non-judgmental outside party. It may be recommended when partners seek to reconnect with one another physically, though may be a benefit to any relationship. Strengths • Experiencing for Oneself This asks a person to assume responsibility for their own pleasure, both the Toucher(s) and Receiver(s). • Mindfulness Partners integrate the use of temperature, pressure, and texture to center their attention on the here-and-now. This approach challenges spectatoring. • Communication Partners are expected to communicate directly as opposed to depending on intuition, expectations, or past experiences. • Consent The focus is on non-demanding and sensory (not sensual) touching. • Acceptance Honors the concept of natural responses which cannot be taught. For example, it’s tricky to “work hard at getting turned on.” • Hard-wired Integrates neurobiology and the role of the limbic system into our understanding of sex. Limitations When originally developed, the Sensate Focus method used what is called a “hierarchy of touch,” using heterosexual insertive sex as the norm. While this model has many helpful aspects, it also benefits from modifications that are more trauma-informed and inclusive of queer, trans/non-binary, polyamorous, and disabled people. The original model also depended on wordless communication during the exercises for the purpose of moving into different mind- states. However, the Queered Sensate Focus approach emphasizes communication, verbal and bodily, before, during and after. It is widely agreed upon within the sexology field that there are many variations on Sensate Focus and I’d like to acknowledge that this is simply another variation- please feel free to find what works best for you and your partner(s). Instruction Melanie Davis of the New Jersey Center for Sexual Wellness states that “…these exercises are typically done in steps or stages over a period of several weeks. One person starts as the “giver” or “toucher” and the other is the “receiver.” Partners then switch roles until they reach stage 3, when there is mutual touching. If you do the exercises in the morning, you can enjoy other sexual activity in the afternoon or evening, or whatever timing works for you. The key is to not mix exercises with your normal sexual activities.” PA License CW018960 Adapted in 2020 by Rebecca Alvarez Rebecca Alvarez LCSW, MEd th 255 South 17 Street, Suite 1509, Philadelphia PA 19103 267-405-6396 • alvarez.lcsw@gmail.com • www.rebeccajalvarez.com Exploration 1 Focus Experiencing for Oneself Non-Erogenous Zone Touch Taking Turns Touching Sensation Touching as Opposed to Sensual Touching Exercise • Beforehand, decide on parameters with therapist, with emphasis on experiencing for oneself. • Take turns exploring different types of touch (ie: the spectrum of heavy to light) noticing sensations of temperature, texture, and pressure as opposed to arousal. o Receiver focuses on the experience of being touched and offers adjustment feedback only if touch is unpleasant/harmful. o Toucher focuses on the experience of giving touch and looks for adjustment feedback from Receiver. • While consensually touching directly afterwards, briefly reflect on experience with one another and plan to revisit with therapist. Exploration 2 Focus Communication Erogenous Zone Touch Taking Turns Touching Sensation Touching as Opposed to Sensual Touching Exercise • Beforehand, decide on parameters with therapist, with emphasis on communication. • Take turns exploring different types of touch (ie: the spectrum of slow to fast) noticing sensations of temperature, texture, and pressure as opposed to arousal. o Receiver focuses on the experience of being touched and shares descriptions, adjustments, and affirmations. o Toucher focuses on the experience of giving touch and looks for feedback from Receiver around how they are experiencing touch. • If aroused, continue touching for sensation as opposed to “goal” of orgasm. • While consensually touching directly afterwards, briefly reflect on experience with one another and plan to revisit with therapist. PA License CW018960 Adapted in 2020 by Rebecca Alvarez Rebecca Alvarez LCSW, MEd th 255 South 17 Street, Suite 1509, Philadelphia PA 19103 267-405-6396 • alvarez.lcsw@gmail.com • www.rebeccajalvarez.com Exploration 3 Focus Acceptance Non-Erogenous Zone Touch Mutual Touching Sensation Touching as Opposed to Sensual Touching Exercise • Beforehand, decide on parameters with therapist, with emphasis on acceptance. • Take turns exploring different types of touch (ex. the spectrum of dull to sharp) noticing sensations of temperature, texture, and pressure as opposed to arousal. o Receiver focuses on being touched and accepting and/or welcoming their individual experience. Receiver offers feedback on their experience. o Toucher focuses on the experience of giving touch. Toucher looks for direct feedback from Receiver and focuses on accepting and/or welcoming this. • While consensually touching directly afterwards, briefly reflect on experience with one another and plan to revisit with therapist. Exploration 4 Focus Integration of Experiencing For Oneself, Communication, and Acceptance Erogenous Zone Touch Mutual Touching Sensation Touching as Opposed to Sensual Touching Exercise • Beforehand, decide on parameters with therapist, with emphasis on integrating experiencing for oneself, communication, and acceptance. • Take turns exploring different types of touch (ex. the spectrum of still to active) noticing sensations of temperature, texture, and pressure as opposed to arousal. o Receiver focuses on the experience of being touched. o Toucher focuses on the experience of giving touch. o Both are experiencing for themselves, communicating, and accepting adjustments and affirmations. • While consensually touching directly afterwards, briefly reflect on experience with one another and plan to revisit with therapist. PA License CW018960 Adapted in 2020 by Rebecca Alvarez
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